By Ean Sreyleak.
Growing up in a society where people define skinny and light skin as beautiful; and attractive, I have seen many people refrain themselves from eating, use unnamed beauty product just to feel fit in. Society has shaped their mindset to the point that if they don’t fit in these categories, they are considered as ugly or unattractive. We have never questioned those standards, we would just assume that it is true.
But the question is how do we measure beauty?
Is it based on your ideal type or is it based on someone you saw on television?
People define beauty differently. For example, I would say people who have big eyes are beautiful, but to you having big eyes doesn’t matter because you think having a shapely nose is better. Beauty is in the eyes of beholder (Hungerford, 1878). There is no rule that fits everything, thus beauty standard does not exist, and you cannot set a standard for it.
The world would be more beautiful if we didn’t think of a particular standard and trying to use it for everything. I myself was bullying for being me, for eating my favorite cake, and for being healthy. People will just say I’m too fat, I should lose weight, so I will be attractive. To me those critics comment don’t hurt at first, but as it occurred repeatedly, it starts to hurt. I start to feel bad for not taking care of myself, I hate myself every time I look into the mirror. Those words got me, I want to refrain myself from eating, so I will feel better.
After a few week forcing myself to not eating, I lost weight, but I feel weak. I’m not the old happy soul anymore. I finally fit in the society yet my heart doesn’t feel right. I would ask is it worth to hurt my feeling just to satisfy other? Why do we need to change ourselves? Why can’t we try to accept them the way they are? Why can’t we be a little bit more open? I decided to stop forcing myself and be the old happy me even thought that mean I will have to listen to those hurtful comment all over again. When I start to open up and love my body the way it is, those judgmental comments will have no effect on me at all. Stop hating your body they haven’t done anything wrong.
Sometimes all we need to do is listen to our heart, hear what it wants and follow it. The path is going to be bumpy, but it is all worth it in the end. The feeling of accepting oneself is incredible and I want you to feel it too. No matter what decision you made, remember to be YOU and I will always be your supporter.